After the Crash
by beautifulpurpleflame
Summary: When two Titans get in a car accident they start to see things a little differently. They even start to feel a little differently towards each other. BBxRae rated for language
1. The Car

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 1: The Car

Beast Boy was still dancing around the garage like a maniac. He was so excited he couldn't help but dance around and sing to himself. The other Titans had never seen him so happy before, and that was saying a lot.

"This is the best day of my life!" squealed Beast Boy. He ran over to Cyborg and hugged him as hard as he could. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Yo, chill man!" said Cyborg pushing him away, but couldn't help smiling. "Here's the key." Cyborg handed Beast Boy the key and Beast Boy could feel tears in his eyes.

"Is Beast Boy sad now?" whispered Starfire to Robin.

"No, just _really_ happy," said Robin smiling.

"I think he's going to faint," said Raven in her normal tone.

Beast Boy slipped the key into the door of his new car and let out another happy squeal. Yes, Beast Boy now had his own car. He had been begging for one for three years now and never expected to actually get one. Cyborg never let him drive the T-car and this only made him pine for one even more. Robin really didn't think Beast Boy should have a car, seeing as he had failed his driving test three times. But Cyborg, being the good friend that he was, decided that he should have his own car and built him one.

"Dude! My very own T-car," said Beast Boy climbing in and starting it up.

"No, it's the B-car," said Cyborg with a smile.

Beast Boy smiled a wide smile and felt the steering wheel. "This is just too cool!" he said shaking with excitement.

"Well, why don't you take her out for a spin?" asked Cyborg.

"I think I will," said Beast Boy. The other Titans stepped back and let Beast Boy pull out. "I'll see you in an hour or two!" he called and then peeled out of there.

"Are you sure he's safe?" asked Robin, very worried.

"Don't worry, man," said Cyborg smiling. "That car is more indestructible than the T-car, it's got more airbags than it does radio stations, and I installed a tracking chip in the dashboard so we'll always know where he is."

"Nice to know how much you trust him," said Raven.

Beast Boy showed off his new car all around the city. He had never felt so cool in his whole life. 'Dude, I was hot before, but now I'm just drop dead sexy,' he thought to himself and laughed. He turned the radio all the way up and sped through the streets.

* * *

The Titans barely saw him for days after he got his new car. He offered to do all the errands and looked for any excuse to get out of the tower. Multiple times when trouble occurred they would have to find him first, since he would never hear his communicator over the radio.

The other problem was his ego. Now that he had wheels he felt like he was the cock of the walk and strut around the tower with his chest puffed out. Cyborg began to question himself for giving Beast Boy the car.

"I'm telling ya, Cy, the ladies just can't keep their hands off me," said Beast Boy relaxing on the couch with his arms behind his head.

"Oh really?" asked Cyborg, very doubtful. "How many have actually sat in your car?"

"Well… none yet, but they all want to," said Beast Boy, not losing his cool for a moment.

"Please, why would the ladies be placing their hands upon you?" asked Starfire.

"It's just an expression, Star," said Robin, who was also fed up with Beast Boy's attitude. "It means that women flirt with him, though I highly doubt it."

"Fine, don't believe me," said a still very smug Beast Boy. "Just take a ride with me and I'll show you."

"No thanks," said Robin. "I feel safer fighting Slade. Besides, I've got Starfire." He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her on the cheek. Starfire giggled and blushed.

"Fine, what about you, Cyborg?" asked Beast Boy sitting up.

"Naw, man, I'm good," said Cyborg.

Beast Boy stood up, stretched, and headed for the garage. "Well, I'm going for another drive. And maybe this time, I'll bring a girl home just to prove to you guys that that car is a chick magnet."

"Please, don't," said Raven looking up from her book. Beast Boy shrugged and danced out of the room. Raven sighed, very annoyed, and closed her book. "Okay, am I the only one who can't stand him?"

"But Raven, you can never stand Beast Boy," said Starfire.

"I mean more than usual," she said standing up.

"Don't worry, he's starting to get on my last nerve, too," said Robin.

"Oh no, you only have one nerve left?" asked Starfire. "Can you get more?"

"It's another expression, Star," said Robin, calmly. He always found her little misunderstandings very cute and was always ready to help her understand. "I mean I'm finding it very hard to keep my patience with him."

"Oh," said Starfire understanding.

"Man, I'm startin to regret buildin him that car," said Cyborg sighing. "I mean, I knew he'd be happy, but I didn't think he'd turn into an ass."

"Cyborg, he's been an ass for years," said Raven exiting. "In more ways than one." She added.

The Titans hoped that Beast Boy's behavior would calm down in time, but it looked as if it was here to stay. As the weeks went on he just got even cockier. Even Starfire began to leave the room when he was going on and on about how cool he was.

Beast Boy finished his plate of tofu eggs when he saw Raven enter. She had a book tucked under her arm and headed over to her usual spot on the couch to read.

"Good morning sunshine," said Beast Boy in his new cocky tone.

Raven grit her teeth and shuttered. "You know I hate it when you call me that," she hissed and went over to the couch. She relaxed and opened her book up to the appropriate page. As she began to read she felt someone plop down next to her. She did her best to ignore him.

"So, what are _you_ doing today?" he asked with a smirk.

"You're looking at it," she said coldly. She really wanted him to leave her alone.

"Aren't you gonna ask me what I'm gonna do today?" he asked.

"No," she said dryly.

"Well," he said stretching his arms out and relaxing on the couch, "I'm gonna go for a drive down to the ol' cinema and take in a show. Then I'm gonna get some fast food. After that I'm gonna go cruising by the pizza shop and let all the girls oo and awe over me."

Raven was extremely annoyed now. She couldn't stand the old playful Beast Boy, but this new cocky Beast Boy just made her hate him. Over the years they had really grown apart, even though they were never that close to begin with. He seemed to humor her less with every inch he gained with height. Now he never tried to make her smile or laugh, and that seemed to be just fine with Raven. Her hands started to tremble with annoyance and her book began to move along with them. This did not go unnoticed by Beast Boy.

"What's your problem?" asked Beast Boy, still smiling.

"Would you please leave me alone?" she asked, trying not to sound angry.

"Why? Having trouble ignoring me?" he asked smugly. "Can't say I blame you. Not many girls can."

"Oh, yeah, that's it," she said sarcastically.

He stood up stretched and said, "So, you need a ride anywhere?"

"I can fly, Beast Boy," she said not looking up from her book.

"I know, I was just offering," he said. "It's weird, but I haven't gotten a chance to drive with any of you, yet."

"Trust me, there's a reason," she said turning the page.

"And what would that be?" asked Beast Boy.

"None of us can stand you because you're a pompous jackass," she said as plain as day.

Beast Boy stared at her for a second and then began to laugh. "Yeah, right!" Raven looked at him for a moment and then went right back to her book. "So, do you want to take a ride with me?"

"No."

"Aw, come on Raven. I found a great coffee shop I think you'd like."

"I don't like coffee."

"They have tea."

"No."

"But no one else is around and I'm sick of driving all alone."

"Then why don't you get one of your many lady fans to ride with you?"

"Because I want to drive one of my friends around."

"And you're asking me, why?"

"Come on, Raven, you're my friend."

"Just barely."

"Oh, that's cold. What do I have to do to get you to come with me?"

"Nothing you can say or do will make me ride with you."

Beast Boy sighed and thought. There had to be something he could offer her to make her take a ride with him. True, she wasn't his first choice to ask to go for a ride with, but she was the only one around. Starfire and Robin were out at the mall and Cyborg was at the electronics store. He would have much rather taken any one of them than Raven. But at this point he was desperate.

"I'll do all of your chores for the week," he offered in a singing tone.

"Make it a month and I'll consider it," said Raven in her monotone voice.

"How about two months and we'll go right now?" he asked, raising his eyes brow.

Raven finally looked up from her book and met with Beast Boy's eyes. He was smiling waiting for her answer. Two months of her chores? That was a good offer. And what did she have to do again? Oh yeah, just sit in a car while Beast Boy did a few laps around the city. "Fine," she said closing her book and rolling her eyes.

"Yes!" said Beast Boy and he grabbed her hand. "Come on, let's go!"

She quickly pulled her hand back and wanted to hit him with it. "Just go, I'll follow you down there."

Raven made sure she was buckled up and made it as tight as she could. She couldn't help but feel nervous, but she didn't want him to see that. As he started the car the radio began to blast and actually blew her hair back. He quickly turned it down and gave her a smile.

"Sorry about that," he said as they pulled out.

"Let's just get this over with," she said, crossing her arms.

Luckily the traffic in the city wasn't terrible that day. That didn't mean Beast Boy didn't drive like a maniac. He swerved in and out of traffic and passed on the right, and all of that stuff everyone does, but it's against the law to do. Raven just bit her tongue and tried not to close her eyes.

"So, where do you want to go?" he asked with a smirk on his face.

"I don't care," she said staring at the road, as if it was going to help his driving. "Just drive around and then take me home."

"Oh come on, there has to be somewhere you want to…"

There came a sudden impact on Beast Boy's side, sending them and the car flying sideways, and then flipping over. They were both screaming as the car tumbled over and over. Glass and smoke spewed everywhere and the sound of the metal and glass crunching was horrifying. Every part of their body collided with part of the car as they flipped. It finally stopped tumbling and skidded to a halt, resting upside down.

Raven couldn't see much, everything around her was a blur. Her whole body was shaking and she couldn't stop these loud yelps of distress that kept jumping from her throat. She was being suspended by her seatbelt and it was choking her throat and bruising her abdomen horribly. She looked down, to the ceiling, and saw glass everywhere, as well as droplets of blood that were collecting.

She looked to her side and saw Beast Boy, being suspended by his seat belt like she was. His eyes were closed and apparently he was unconscious. Blood was splattered on his face. She could taste her own blood in her mouth. Every part of her hurt and she felt very confused. Even when she tried to breath her lungs were in pain. She could hear people screaming and yelling, but she wasn't sure where it was coming from. She felt her head grow heavy and within moments it all went black.


	2. Reality Slap

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 2: Reality Slap

A rhythmic beeping pulsed through Beast Boy's ears. Then he heard familiar voices talking quietly around him. His eye lids felt so heavy, and they hurt. But he had to see where he was. He struggled and slowly opened his eyes. He couldn't see anything, just fuzzy objects.

"Friends, I believe he is waking up," said a familiar Tameranean voice. Beast Boy could see an orange blur come closer to him. And then another, darker, blur came forward. Then another blur in a colorful suit. "Beast Boy, can you hear me?"

Beast Boy blinked a couple times and waited for his eyes to focus. "Where am I?"

"You are in the hospital," said Starfire.

"I am?" he asked. He couldn't really remember what had happened. Everything was all meshed together in a big puddle of confused memories.

"You were in a bad car accident three days ago," said Robin. "You and Raven."

Three days ago? He had been out for three days? But then another question pushed those two right out of the way. "Raven?" He could barely remember who that was. That's when everything became a little clearer. He remembered getting in the car and driving with Raven next to him. And then… something happened. "How is she?"

The three looked at each other uneasily. Beast Boy suddenly felt a horrible pain in his chest. His heart jumped into his throat and he felt as if he was going to be sick.

"She's… not that good, man," said Cyborg at last.

"Is she going to be okay?" asked Beast Boy nervously.

"We… we don't know," said Robin. They moved away from the front of his bed and he looked at the person lying across from him. It was Raven, but he could barely recognize her.

"Oh my God," he said to himself.

"She has not yet started to heal herself," said Starfire shakily. "We fear she will not wake up." Her voice slightly cracked as she said this and Robin quickly put his arm around her.

"What have I done?" Beast Boy asked himself feeling an overwhelming amount of guilt for the current situation.

"It wasn't your fault," said Robin quickly. "A tractor trailer ran a red light and hit your car just before stopping. If he hadn't stopped when he did neither of you would be here."

"How hurt am I?" he asked trying to look at himself.

"You're pretty banged up," said Cyborg, taking his chart and looking over it. "You've broken your left leg in three places, your right ankle has been shattered, three bruised ribs, your left arm is broken in two places, you have a sprained neck, broken nose, a collapsed lung at one point, and a bad concussion. Not to mention all of the stitches in various places."

"No wonder I feel so shitty," said Beast Boy with a fake chuckle.

"Do you want some more medication?" asked Robin. "I can go get the nurse."

"I would like that," said Beast Boy. Robin nodded and headed out of the room, with Starfire at his side. She had been on the edge of crying the whole time and needed to get out of there.

"How… how bad is she?" asked Beast Boy looking at Raven.

"I don't think ya need to know that right now," said Cyborg in a low voice.

"Please tell me something," said Beast Boy desperately.

"She's still alive," said Cyborg putting his chart back. "Now you should try to get some sleep. The nurse will be here any second to help you with the pain." He said this in a little more of a comforting tone.

That didn't help him in any way. His eyes had finally focused a little better and he looked around. He saw all of the monitors around him, beeping with little lights flying around the dark screens. He finally shut his eyes to rest. He began to listen to his own breathing and that scared him. His lungs were making a raspy sound and trembled as he breathed.

He hadn't even realized that he had fallen asleep until he woke up. A nurse was just finishing up checking on him and gave him a smile as she left. He looked around and saw that the whole room was full of flowers and balloons and various gifts. But his eyes went right past those things and went to Raven.

She lay quite still in the bed. Tubes of all sorts were sticking out of her and were attached to different devices. He watched as her monitors became in sync with his own. He really would never have recognized her if it wasn't for her pale skin and violet hair. Her neck was in a brace, just as his was, and held her head high. Her eyes were black and her head was wrapped up in bandages. Her left arm was sticking straight and had an IV sticking out of it. There was a board attached to her arm to keep it straight. He focused in on her other arm and saw various bandages covering stitches, and her wrist was in a cast. But that was all he could see, the rest of her body was covered up by the blanket.

'Why?' he asked himself. 'Why did I make her come for a ride with me? I should have left her alone just like she asked. She always knows what's best and I never listen. Why couldn't I have listened? Just this once. God I've been such an asshole lately. I deserve this, but not her. Not her! Please wake up Raven.'

"Please," he said allowed and felt his chest tighten. He felt as if he was going to cry. He felt so guilty. This was all his fault. That tractor trailer may have hit them, but he should've been paying attention. He might have seen it in time to swerve out of the way. He could have done something.

A few hours later his friends returned to check on him and Raven. They had come in with hope that she might have woken up, but weren't all that surprised to see her still unchanged. They were happy that Beast Boy was still awake and doing well.

"Friend Beast Boy, I have brought you a balloon to make you feel well," said Starfire, adding to the collection that were around the room. It read, "It's a Boy!"

"Gee, thanks Star," said Beast Boy, not knowing what else to say. "Hey, I never got to ask, how's my car."

"Totaled," said Robin. "They had to use the jaws of life to pull _you_ out."

"Well this day keeps getting better and better," he groaned. "But I guess it's for the best. I'm sorry I've been such a jerk lately."

"Jerk is putting it mildly," said Cyborg. "You went beyond jerk about two days after you got the car."

"I know, and I'm sorry," said Beast Boy. "I guess I was just liking the fact that I had such a cool car. It made me feel, I don't know, special."

"You have always been special, Beast Boy," said Starfire. "You did not need the car to make you feel that way."

"I know," sighed Beast Boy. "Do you guys forgive me?"

"Like we're going to say no to a guy in a hospital bed," said Cyborg with a smile. Beast Boy smiled back and felt a little better. Now all he had to do was say all of this to Raven and he would feel completely better.

It was late at night three days later when he was woken from his medicated slumber. He slowly opened his eyes and looked around the dark room. He could see the lights of the monitors and hear them as well. But he could hear another noise. A moaning and fidgeting. He adjusted his sensitive eyes and looked across to Raven. She was moving and she sounded as if she was choking. Beast Boy immediately pushed the call button on his bed.

As soon as the nurse came in Beast Boy nearly screamed, "Something's wrong with Raven!" The nurse went over to Raven quickly and noticed the problem. Raven had woken up and was very confused. She had been choking on her endotracheal tube and the nurse quickly calmed her down with some medicine that she shot right into her IV. Soon Raven stopped choking and laid there in a daze.

"Is she okay?" asked Beast Boy. "What happened?"

"She's fine now," said the nurse, but basically ignored him. She wrote a few things on Ravens chart and then rushed out to get nurses and a doctor. Soon Ravens bed was surrounded by many medical persons talking and writing and poking and prodding Raven.

Beast Boy tried see around them, but didn't have much success. He kept asking questions but they wouldn't answer him. It took an hour for them to finish and leave her alone. By that time she was asleep again and Beast Boy cursed those stupid doctors. He wanted to talk to her, to know that she was okay. But he would have to wait a little longer. It took him a while before he was able to fall back asleep.

The next morning he woke up to a nurse filling his with various liquids and then leaving. This was how he had woken up like this for a few days now. Once his mind had cleared he remembered about the events during the night and he looked to Raven. She was still asleep. He knew the other Titans would be there soon.

Sure enough, within the hour, the other three Titans arrived and sat at Ravens bedside. What Beast Boy would have given to sit with them. He wanted to be closer to her so he could see how she was doing.

"Raven, can you her me?" asked Starfire taking her hand. "It is I, Starfire." They waited and slowly she began to stir. This made the others twitch with excitement.

"I think she's waking up," said Robin. "Raven, can you open your eyes?"

Raven moaned a little and slowly her eyes opened. She looked around and tried to move her head, but it was restrained from the brace around her neck. The others smiled, very relieved that she had finally woken up.

"Hey, welcome back, girl," said Cyborg.

Ravens eyes were still out of focus, but she could recognize their voices. Her throat hurt terribly and the rest of her body ached. She wasn't sure where she was or how she got there. She only knew that her friends were near her.

"What…" she started, but she winced with the pain from her throat.

"Hush, you should not speak," said Starfire patting her hand. "You are very injured."

"You've been in a coma for almost a week," said Robin.

"Why?" she was able to peep.

"You were in a car accident with Beast Boy," said Cyborg. It was at this moment that they remembered that Beast Boy was in the room too and they turned to him. He was relieved to finally be able to see Raven, and her eyes were open.

"Hi Raven," he said hesitantly.

"He was very much damaged as well," said Starfire.

Raven looked at him, but was still confused about what was going on. At that moment she wasn't sure exactly who Beast Boy was or why he would be damaged. She really hadn't been able to listen to what her friends were telling her, her head was in such a spin. It took her a while to put two and two together; that they had been in a car accident.


	3. From Healing to Home

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 3: From Healing to Home

Beast Boy sat in his bed, drinking some soda through a straw. Raven was asleep and she had a right to be. She had been asked questions and put through various tests all day from the doctors and nurses. Poor Beast Boy could only watch and wish for them to leave her alone. It had been two days since she had woken up and she was finally thinking straight. But she had not really spoken to Beast Boy yet. There was just no time. She was either being poked about or getting some rest.

Raven slowly stirred and then opened her eyes. She yawned and longed to stretch her arms out. Her muscles felt so tight and achy. She looked around and saw that it all wasn't a nightmare. She was still in the hospital.

"Good morning," said Beast Boy, even though it was late afternoon.

"Hi," said Raven moving her bed so she was sitting more upright.

"How are you feeling?" asked Beast Boy in a sincere and serious voice.

"Okay, I guess," she said in a scratchy voice. "I'm sick of lying here, though."

"Yeah, tell me about," Beast Boy laughed. "What I wouldn't give to get up and walk around a little. I can't even tell you how much I want to go home."

"Well I'm healing myself this afternoon, so I'll be home in a couple days," said Raven casually.

"Oh," said Beast Boy a little caught off guard by this. "Well, I guess I'll be getting a new roommate then."

"Guess so," she said in a kind voice before reclining back down. "Unless you want me to heal you too."

"No, I couldn't ask that of you," he said shaking his head.

"I really don't mind," she said plainly.

"You don't?" he asked very surprised. "But, doesn't it take a lot out of you?"

"Yes, but if it will get us home in a couple days rather than a couple months, I'm willing to put up with being a little weak," she said closing her eyes and relaxing.

"I don't know," he said thinking deeply. "I mean, it is my fault we're in this mess in the first place."

"No it's not," said Raven. "I know what happened in the accident. There was nothing you could have done to prevent what happened."

"Yeah, but I shouldn't have made you come with me," he said, feeling guilt once again. "I should have just listened to you and left you be."

"Well it doesn't matter now," said Raven. "Now do you want me to heal you or not?"

"As much as I want you to, I'm going to have to say no," he sighed. "It just wouldn't be right. You nearly died because of me, I can't ask you to heal me."

"Well I gave you the chance to chose," she said assertively. "But I'm healing you whether you say yes or not. So lie down and get ready."

"Raven, I…"

"Lay down damn it!"

He quickly obeyed and moved his bed so that he was lying down. He really didn't feel good about this, but he no longer had a say in the matter. He sighed and closed his eyes. Soon a light blue aura filled the room and engulfed the two. They both rose a foot off of the ground and the healing began. Beast Boy felt warm and cool at the same time and his body tingled. It was like being caught in a permanent shiver.

The nurses were in for quite a surprise when they went to check on the two Titans later that day. They screamed at the sight and it wasn't long before the other three Titans were called down. Worse case scenarios played through the Titans minds as they raced down to the hospital. They were relieved when they saw the two floating above the bed.

"Raven's healing herself and Beast Boy," said Robin.

"It is one of her powers," said Starfire.

"Well thank goodness," said one of the nurses. "We thought they had been possessed by demons or something."

"Yes, we were about to call in a priest," said another nurse.

"Yeah, well, don't mention anythin like that to Raven," said Cyborg. "She's kinda touchy on anythin to do with… uh, well… demons."

"How long will this be going on?" asked another nurse.

"We're not sure," said Robin. "It might be hours, it might be days."

"Well, we'll call you when they are finished and healed," said one of the nurses.

"Thank you," said Starfire. "We shall return."

Two days passed before Raven was done and the two were basically healed. Slowly they lowered from their place in the air and rested upon their beds. The whole while they had been in a trance; a new experience for Beast Boy. He woke up and felt a little dizzy and light headed. But his body felt great. No pain at all. He slowly sat up and looked to Raven.

"Wow, I feel great," he smiled. Raven weakly smiled and then laid her head back down. "Raven, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine," she said tiredly. "Now let's get the doctors in here to take all of these stupid casts off." She pushed her assistance button an soon the nurses came in. They were quite glad to see the two patients in their beds, not hovering above them.

The three other Titans were alerted that their friends were well and made their way to the hospital. By the time they were allowed inside the two had had their casts and neck braces removed. Their stitches had disappeared and they were left with very few scars. Beast Boy was sitting up and stretching like crazy. Raven was lying on her side, asleep.

"Oh friends, you are well again!" said Starfire clapping.

"Is Raven okay?" asked Robin.

"She's just drained," said Beast Boy. He hated seeing her like that. He was sick of seeing her in pain and being weak. He hated the fact that he was cause for all of her suffering. "So are we goin home?" he asked trying to change the subject in his mind.

"Hopefully," said Cyborg. "You two look good to me." He glanced over at the slightly pale Raven. "Well _you_ do at least."

After a last check up and a lot of paper work Beast Boy and Raven were given the okay to go home. The doctors were all quite astonished and couldn't believe that they were well. It was a story they would tell for years to come.

Robin and Starfire helped Beast Boy walk to his room while Cyborg carried Raven. Beast Boy hated that he needed all this help, but he couldn't deny that he was still a little weak from not moving around for a week. It was so nice to be home, to be in his own room. He had missed his messy floor and that sour smell that it emitted. It was obvious that no one had gone near it in the week he wasn't home.

It was late when they got home, but they still had not eaten yet. Beast Boy had longed for a good meal and couldn't wait to have some of his tofu. He had found it very difficult to get a vegetarian meal in the hospital. He hobbled out to the common room and was happy to see that dinner was being prepared.

"Dude, I have never been so hungry in my life," said Beast Boy sitting down. "You better be making me something meat-free."

"Don't worry, I am," said Cyborg over his shoulder. "I'll hold off on the tofu vs. meat battles until you're a little stronger."

"Wow, no fights about my tofu," laughed Beast Boy. "I must have been near death." Suddenly, and he didn't know why, he thought of Raven. "Has anyone checked on Raven?"

"I have checked upon her a few minutes ago," said Starfire. "She was sleeping. I still fear for her health."

"Well I told her not to heal me," he said quickly in defense.

"Calm down, Beast Boy," said Robin. "We're not blaming you. Raven's the one person who would never push herself if she thought she couldn't handle it."

Beast Boy sighed. He knew Robin was right, but he still couldn't help feeling like it was his fault. After he ate dinner, three platefuls, he decided to bring her some tea. The others had told him not to, that he was still too weak, but he insisted and was too stubborn to have his mind changed.

He slowly pushed her door aside with his free hand. In the other he held a mug of tea. "Raven?" he said softly as he entered her dark room. His sensitive eyes adjusted and he looked around. It was still as creepy as ever, dark and depressing. He looked to her bed and saw her lying there. She was curled up in the fetal position with her blanket covering her. "Raven," he said again, walking towards her. She moaned softly and curled up even tighter. He sat down next to her on her bed and looked at her. Her face was calm, as it always seemed to be, but there was something more about it. It seemed… vulnerable.

Beast Boy sighed and put the tea down on her bedside table. He looked at her silently and watched as her body slowly rose and fell with her breathing. She looked so delicate. The moon shone in through her large window and illuminated her pale body. Her gray lips were slightly apart and her eyes seemed relaxed. Finally, after studying her, he lightly shook her.

"Raven?" he said softly.

She whined and slowly woke up. She turned over and saw Beast Boy sitting next to her. "Beast Boy? What are you doing here?" Her voice was weak and tired.

"I brought you some tea," he said reaching for the mug. "I thought you might like some. You haven't eaten anything for days." This was true and could definitely be seen. She looked the thinnest she had ever been, and she had been thin to begin with. She was Starfire thin now. He had lost weight too, but he barely noticed it.

She slowly sat up and took the tea. "Thank you," she said sipping it. She gave a satisfied sigh and leaned back against her headboard. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," he chuckled. "How about you? I've never seen you like this."

"Well I've never used my powers like that before," she said resting her head on her shoulder. It felt heavy and she still felt too weak to keep it propped up. "But I think it was worth it."

"Well I'm not so sure," said Beast Boy in a worried tone. "You really shouldn't have healed me. You should have just taken care of yourself."

"You're my teammate and friend Beast Boy," she said plainly. "I wouldn't have been a good friend or teammate if I had just left you lying there in pain."

"Well I deserved it," he said looking down. "I was acting like a complete jackass and I paid the price. One asshole is equal to one tractor trailer, I guess. I'm just sorry you were there when the bill came."

"These things happen," Raven sighed. "But no matter what, you're my friend. Though, you can get rather annoying at times, and sometimes I just can't down right stand you, I would do anything to make sure you were alright."

"Wow, you're a better friend than I thought," said Beast Boy with a smile.

"And don't you forget it," she said in a voice that sounded more like her. "Now leave so I can go back to sleep."

Beast Boy nodded weakly and stood up. As he left she finished the tea and went back to her curled up position in the bed. She pulled the covers up to her neck and sighed as the warm tea soon coursed through her body.


	4. Acting Strange

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 4: Acting Strange

The next morning Raven awoke and felt much better. She actually smiled as she sat up. Her body felt refreshed and well rested. She slid out from under her covers and got up to stretch. The sun was very bright and warmed her skin. As she stretched she noticed how loose her clothes were. It was then that she realized that she wasn't in her usual uniform. She was in a pair of sweatpants and a tee-shirt. She hadn't remembered putting this on. She suddenly felt horribly embarrassed at the thought of the other Titans seeing her in this. Not only that, but Cyborg had carried her and Beast Boy had sat next to her on her bed. A few of the books on her shelf flew onto the ground. She took a deep breath in and calmed herself down.

She went to her closet and grabbed a clean uniform. She slipped it on, but it was too big. She knew she would just look foolish if she went out into the common room in a baggy leotard. She groaned to herself. She didn't have a choice but to wear the sweatpants and tee-shirt.

She looked at herself in the mirror and saw how nasty her hair looked. She realized that she hadn't taken a proper shower in over a week. Her stomach was growling and she was in pain from it, but she knew that she had to bathe first. She grabbed some clean undergarments and made her way to the shower.

Beast Boy awoke and felt normal, for the first time in over a week. He crawled out of his bed and stretched. It felt nice to wake up at home. He grabbed some clothes off the floor and threw them on. They were cool from lying on the floor and made him feel even more awake.

As he walked down the hall he could hear the shower running. He was getting closer to the bathroom door and he had a sixth sense about who was in there. He heard the water being turned off and someone flipping their wet hair back and forth. His suspicions were confirmed when he heard a familiar, gravely voice say, "Shit!" He paused at the sound of this and stood right outside the bathroom door. "Can I get some help?" he heard her call.

"Are you okay," he said a little too quickly, but he was nervous that she was in trouble.

"Beast Boy?" she asked, a little startled by his quick response.

"Uh, yeah," he said, realizing he must have sounded like he was stalking her outside of the bathroom door.

"Can you do me a favor?" she asked a little hesitantly.

"Sure, anything," he said feeling embarrassed about how he must have sounded, and he covered his eyes with his hand naturally.

"I forgot to grab towels," she said very annoyed, but she wasn't annoyed with him. She sounded aggravated with herself. "Could you get me some from the closet?"

For a moment Beast Boy's mind suddenly realized that just on the other side of the door Raven was standing naked. He quickly slapped himself mentally for thinking of such a thing and answered her. "Uh, yeah, just hold on a sec." He ran over to the linen closet and grabbed some towels. He ran back and knocked on the door. "Here ya go."

The door opened a few inches Beast Boy pushed his arm through with the towels. She grabbed them and as she did the side of her wet hand brushed his dry one. A strange feeling welled in his stomach and he felt the blood rush into his cheeks. He quickly pulled his arm out of the moist, warm bathroom. Before closing the door Raven said a quick, "Thank you."

"Anytime," he said in an odd tone. As he walked down to the common room he felt so stupid. He must have sounded so creepy. He sighed and entered through the door leading to the common room.

Cyborg was whistling as he made a large breakfast. He was a big guy and he always had a big appetite. Robin was sitting at that table reading the paper and had a cup of coffee in front of him. He could never start his day until he new what was going on in current events and had a good cup of caffeine in his system. Starfire was at the counter with the orange juicer in front of her. It was the one cooking job the Titans trusted her with, as long as she _only_ used oranges. It took her a while to realizing that orange juice was made of oranges and only oranges, not everything that was the color orange or even yellow.

"Good mornin BB," said Cyborg with a smile as he flipped a dozen pancakes onto a plate.

"Hey," Beast Boy managed to say as he made his way to the table.

"Friend Beast Boy, how are you feeling this morning?" asked Starfire as she poured the juice she had just made into a pitcher.

"Okay," he simply said.

"You sure?" asked Robin who could sense that something was a little… off with him. "You sound kind of down."

"No, I'm just getting used to being home," he said with a smile. He realized that he must have looked a little low and that he had better perk up before they asked more questions.

Cyborg placed all the breakfast foods he had made onto the table and sat down with a large, hungry grin on his face and in his eyes. Starfire poured them all a glass of fresh juice and then sat down herself.

"Will Raven not be joining us this morning?" asked Starfire.

"She's just getting out of the shower," said Beast Boy serving himself. "I'm sure she'll be here soon."

"And how would you know that she was gettin outta the shower?" asked Cyborg cocking an eyebrow.

Beast Boy thought quickly. "Someone was turning the shower off when I passed by the bathroom and the three of you are in here," he said in a "duh" voice. "So obviously she was in the shower."

"Well, someone's starting to feel better," said Cyborg a little surprised by Beast Boy's tone.

Raven entered, her hair still wet but combed straight. She blushed at the fact that she was still in those sweatpants and tee-shirt. She walked over to the table and sat down. As embarrassed as she was, she was starving.

"A morning of goodness I wish to you, Raven," said Starfire with a large smile. "Are you feeling well?"

"Yes, thank you," said Raven serving herself quickly. She began to eat ravenously, something the others had never seen her do before.

"Hungry?" asked Robin very surprised by her appetite.

"Very," said Raven sighing as she swallowed.

Beast Boy watched her eat out of the corner of his eye. She looked calm as she ate, even though she was eating as if she would never eat again. He noticed how graceful she was with her fork and knife, as if she knew some secret table manner dance. She looked so elegant. He had to admit that he had never really seen her eat before. She kept to her tea and a few snacks during the day. He figured that she wasn't a "meal" person. By this point he was no longer looking at her out of the corner of his eye, he was looking right at her. This did not go unnoticed by the other Titans and soon Raven caught on as well.

"You okay?" she asked after a few awkward moments of her staring back at him, with him not noticing.

He snapped out of his stare and looked around the table. The other three were looking at him as queerly as Raven was. He felt himself blush and he knew he had to get out of there. "Well, I'm done," he said with a quick nervous smile and got up so fast his chair nearly fell over. The others watched silently as he ran out of the room.

"Jeez, what's up with him?" asked Cyborg.

"He is acting strange, yes?" said Starfire.

"I'll say," said Robin.

"And why was he starin at you like that?" asked Cyborg looking at Raven.

"How should I know?" said Raven shrugging and eating another piece of her pancake.

Beast Boy went to his room and locked the door. He felt as if he was hyperventilating. A million things were rushing through his head. He began to pace back and forth in his room.

"Dude! What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked himself. "Staring at Raven? While she's eating! Why the hell would you do that? Now they all think you're insane." He collapsed on his bed and covered his face with his hands. He gave himself a few moments to calm down. "I know why I was staring at her. Because I nearly killed her. I almost ended her life. That's not guilt that can go away easily."

He hated thinking about mortality, but he had thought about it more often than he would have wanted to. Unfortunately, death was something that had appeared in his life numerous times. Now he thought about how close he was to having another person close to him die. He couldn't even think about what he would have done had she died. How could he live without her sarcasm? Her emotionless face. Her constant annoyed groans. Well, maybe he could live without those things. But then he thought about the things he would actually miss. Those few, once in a blue moon, moments when she smiled. Her willingness to always listen when he had a problem. The wisdom that seemed to pour from her soul. She was a one in million. No, one in a billion. Actually, the truth was that there really was no one else like her.

Suddenly the room felt like it was closing in on him. He had to get out of there, to clear his mind. He quickly got off his bed and exited his room. As he quickly walked down the hall he saw Starfire walking towards him.

"Hello Beast Boy," she said sweetly. "Would you like to…"

"Sorry, Star, I need to go out for a sec," he said passing her by.

"Oh, okay," she said a little confused and flustered by how fast he was walking by her.

He exited the tower and went to the one spot he always went to think. He sat on a boulder that rested right on the water's edge. He only came here when he really needed to think things over. It was his spot. He skipped a few stones and took a few deep breaths of the cool air in. It had been a nice morning, but had quickly turned to overcast and a bit cool. And now there was a cold mist floating around, as if it wanted to rain but couldn't pull itself to do it. He slowly breathed out and watch the hot air float out over the sea like a cloud.


	5. Break Down

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 5: Breakdown

"I see your thinking spot hasn't changed much," said a voice from behind him.

He quickly turned around and saw Raven, holding her arms against the cold, wet air. "Yeah, well, why change a good thing?" he said with a fake smile.

"Starfire said you looked a little upset," she said walking over to him.

"And they sent you out here to make sure I was okay, right?" he asked with a bitter laugh.

"Pretty much," she said sitting down next to him. She tucked her knees up under her chin and looked out over the gray horizon. "So… what's going on?"

"Nothing," he lied with a sigh.

"You've always been a horrible liar, Beast Boy," she said dryly. "Tell me what the matter is."

"I don't really feel comfortable talking to you," he said in an almost cold voice. "I mean, it's not that you really care."

"I care," she said, but her voice suggested otherwise.

"Yeah, right," he said in a chuckle. "I'm sure you wouldn't have come out here if they hadn't made you."

"Okay, that's true," she sighed. "But it's not because I don't care. I just… I don't know how to deal with you."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" he asked a little offended.

Raven sighed sadly and closed her eyes. "Beast Boy, you know that we don't have the best of friendships. I mean, we almost did, but time… time just pushed us further apart. We're two different people with different ideas of how life should be lived. You like to drive around in a fast car and play video games. I like to sit in silence to read and think. That's what I mean by I don't know how to deal with you. We don't have any common ground."

"So why did you come down here to make me feel better?" he asked in an almost angry voice. "You're not one to be made to do anything you don't want to."

"That's true," she said feeling the anger venting through him. "So obviously I must want you to be okay. Like I told you in the hospital, I'm your teammate and your friend. It's my responsibility to make sure you're alright."

"You're responsibility," he smiled bitterly. "Well it's so nice to know that you care so much about me." He didn't know where this was coming from. He had come out there to get rid of the guilt he felt for her. Now he felt anger that he couldn't control.

"I didn't come out here to fight," said Raven trying to suppress her own anger. "I came out here to see what was wrong with you. Obviously… it's me." She stood up and shivered in the cold. "I'm sorry I make you so upset. I'm sorry that you feel so much anger towards me. I know it's well deserved and if it will make you feel better I'll do my best to stay out of your way. I hope you feel better." And with that she turned and started climbing the rocks back up to the tower.

Beast Boy felt horrible now. He had gone beyond asshole at this point. First he acts like a pompous jackass, her own words, then he almost kills her, now he was making her feel guilty for no reason. This was too much for him to handle.

"Raven!" he shouted and turned around. She nearly slipped on the wet rocks she was so startled. She turned around and stared at him.

"What?"

He wanted to say so many things. Where should he begin? What should he say? Did she even care? Had he gone too far? "I'm sorry." It was the only thing he lips could form.

"For what?" she asked, her teeth nearly chattering she was so cold.

"I'm sorry… for everything," he sighed.

Raven heard the sadness in his voice, which confused her since only seconds before it had been filled with rage, and started walking back over to him.

"You're not what's wrong with me," he said looking down at the rock he was sitting on. "_I'm_ what's wrong with me. I'm such a horrible person."

"Now why would you say something like that?" she asked crouching down next to him. "You're not a horrible person."

"Yes I am," he said, nearly cutting her off. "And I am so sorry, Raven. I've been nothing but an asshole to you these past few years, and I shouldn't have been. I have a choice about my personality. You don't. You have to be quiet and reserved because of your powers. But I had to be selfish and act like it was your fault you were the way you were. And I even felt anger towards you for it." Then he felt his throat close up and his face grow hot. "And then I nearly killed you. I almost fucking killed you." As these words escaped his mouth his voice cracked and tears filled his eyes.

Raven had really never seen him like this. She wasn't sure what to do. So she did the one thing she felt was right. She wrapped her arms around him and brought him close to her. She was now sitting up on her knees and Beast Boy's head rested on her chest. She caressed his head soothingly and tried to calm him down.

"I'm sorry," he said again and again into her chest. "I'm so sorry."

"Oh Beast Boy," she said in a quiet voice. She lifted his head from her chest and held it in her hands. "You have nothing to be sorry for." She wiped his tears away with her thumbs. This didn't help him much and he just cried even harder. She put his head back to her chest and rocked back and forth trying to hush him. "Ssh, you can't help feeling resentment towards me. I've said my share of mean things to you. It's just the way our weird little friendship works. And I know you never meant any harm to come to me."

He had never really cried like this before. He felt like he was letting out all of the repressed emotions he had kept over the years. From all of the sadness that had occurred in his life. Between the sobbing breaths he took he listened to Ravens heart beating. Her chest was warm and her heart was soothing. He realized that he had almost ended that. He had almost made her heart stop beating forever. He had almost made the warmth of her body leave her, never to return.

Raven could feel all of the emotions he was feeling and she did her best to distance herself from them. She couldn't afford to feel all of this sadness, this regret, this mournfulness, this guilt. This wasn't the Beast Boy she had come to know. She wasn't even sure where he was anymore. She even wondered where she was. Normally she would never have let him hold her, or she hold him. This was beyond odd or even strange. But she didn't feel like this was wrong. She knew he needed to be comforted, and of all the people to give him this she knew that she was the only one that he could believe. Because she would never had done this. But since she was, it must have been genuine. She must have really wanted him to feel better.

By now it was raining and it was cold. The rain poured down on them and their hot breath wafted into the air in thick puffs. They shivered in each other's arms and held each other closer for warmth. The icy rain dripped off of Ravens face and onto Beast Boy's head. They were quite a sight to see. Finally Beast Boy had calmed down and felt the courage to release his grip of her and actually look her in the eyes. Her face was wet and cold, yet at the same time warm and comforting to him.

"I think we should go inside," she said with a soft smile. He nodded and she quickly wrapped them in a black aura in the shape of a raven and teleported them back inside the tower.

The black aura faded away and revealed the hallway that lead to both of their rooms. They were both soaking wet and shivering from the cold. The tower was warm and it was a relief to their chilled skin.

Beast Boy was shaking. Not so much from the cold but from all of the crying he had done. It had taken a lot out of him and he felt quite drained from it. Raven looked at him and rubbed his arm.

"Are you going to be okay?" she asked sweetly. This was definitely a Raven that had never been seen before.

He gave her a weak nod and said, "Yeah, I think so." He couldn't bring himself to look her in the eyes. He suddenly felt ashamed for the way he had behaved, they way he had cried not only in front of her, but upon her.

"I'm going to go meditate in my room," she said, trying to make eye contact with him. "If you need to talk just knock on the door."

"You don't mind me interrupting your meditation?" he asked, finally looking at her.

"Not today," she said in a more "Raven" tone and with a little smile.

"Okay, thanks," he said weakly smiling back. They slowly parted, but Beast Boy quickly turned back. "Oh, and Raven?" She turned back around. "I would really appreciate it if you didn't tell the others about… what happened out there. I know they're probably going to ask you."

"Don't worry, Beast Boy," she said upon reaching her door. "I'm not one to kiss and tell." She looked at him and saw him look confused and even… blushing? "It's just an expression."

"Uh, yeah, I know," he said awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. "Well, I'll see ya later."

"Okay," she said and then entered her room.

Beast Boy was going to go into his room, but he decided he would rather take a shower. He was still grimy from the hospital, cold from the rain, and his eyes and face burned and itched from the tears. He knew a shower would make him at least look a little more normal.

After his shower he went out into the common room. Only Cyborg was in there, sitting on the couch flipping through the channels. He plopped down next to him and asked, "Hey, watcha doin?"

"Uh, just channel surfin," said Cyborg, a little surprised with Beast Boy's attitude.

"You wanna play some video games?" asked Beast Boy with a hopeful smile.

"Sure," said Cyborg smiling back.

Beast Boy hopped off the couch, set up one of the games, and grabbed the two controllers. He tossed Cyborg one and the two began a robot battle. Cyborg couldn't believe the change in Beast Boy. He was… normal. He hadn't been like this in weeks thanks to the car and the accident.

The rest of the day went by pretty smoothly. Beast Boy started feeling like his old self again and was enjoying the feeling. He even cracked a few corny jokes and made the other three laugh, but that was only because they couldn't believe that after all he had been through his sense of humor hadn't changed a bit. There was even a disagreement at lunch between soy milk and regular milk.

"I am so glad to see that you are feeling better," said Starfire with a smile.

"I'm glad to feel better, Star," said Beast Boy smiling back. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go lie down. I kinda had a rough morning."

"Okay, see ya man," said Cyborg. Beast Boy game him a parting smile and headed off to his room. The moment he was gone the three Titans quickly began to talk. "Okay, am I the only one who wants to know what the hell Raven did to him?"

"Yeah, no kidding," said Robin scratching his head. "He's acting… normal."

"Is that a bad thing?" asked Starfire. "I thought we wanted him to be normal."

"Hey, I'm not sayin that this is a bad thing," said Cyborg quickly. "I'm just sayin that it kinda came outta nowhere."

"She must have given him some talking," said Robin. "Though I can't imagine what _Raven_ would have said to change him back to his old fun loving self." The three Titans pondered all of this for most of the day.


	6. Pleasant Dreams

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 6: Pleasant Dreams

Beast Boy stirred and slowly woke up. His throat felt dry and his bladder seemed too full. An odd feeling, but it woke him up. It was dark out and he looked at his clock. 3:06 a.m., he had only been asleep for four hours. He had watched a movie with his friends after dinner and then gone to bed. His nap earlier that day seemed to have no affect on him.

He dragged his feet down the hall and made it to the bathroom. After relieving his bladder he got a cup of water. He downed about two and a half cups and then, quite satisfied, headed back to his room. On his way he passed Ravens room and stopped when his sensitive ears heard a faint sound. He knew that it had to be coming from within her room, so he pressed his elf ear to the cold steel of the door. He heard her moaning and whimpering. Suddenly the light above him shattered. He was quite happy that it had been off.

He wasn't sure what to do, but he decided he would take his chances and go in. He slid her door open and crept inside. She was tossing and turning in her bed, the sheet tangled within her legs. She gripped the mattress tightly and was breathing quickly. He could see sweat gleaming off of her skin in the moonlight. Various objects were flying off of her shelves and piling up on the floor.

He kneeled next to her bed and slowly touched her arm. "Raven," he whispered. The sound of his voice seemed to only intensify her nightmare. She writhed and tossed back and forth. "Raven," he said again, this time a little louder. He took her hand and said her name again. "Raven." She suddenly jumped and sat up. She saw the dark figure in her room and nearly screamed and fell off of her bed. "Whoa, calm down, it's me," he said quickly.

"Beast Boy?" she said shocked. "What… what the hell are you doing in here?"

"I got up to get a drink and I heard you moaning," he said honestly. "It sounded like you were having one hell of a nightmare."

Raven thought about her dream and grabbed her head. She felt her heart racing and waited for it to calm down. "Yes, I was," she said finally. She had been propped up on her knees and now slowly went to a sitting position. She rubbed her face and sighed.

Beast Boy knew he was pushing the boundaries, but he crawled onto her bed and sat in front of her. "You wanna talk about it?"

"No," she said in a tired voice. "I just… I don't want to think about it."

"That bad, huh?"

"Yeah," she said running her fingers through her hair.

"It wasn't about me, was it?" he asked with a smile.

"Well…" she started and looked away.

The smile left his face and he looked down. "Oh."

"It was just a dream, Beast Boy, you don't have to get offended," she said feeling his rejection.

"I know," he said quickly. There was a slight pause between them. "What was I doing?" he asked hesitantly.

"I'm not sure," she said a bit confused. "All I know is that you were there yelling at me and I was crying. I'm not really sure what was going on. It's all a blur now."

"I was yelling at you?" he asked sadly.

"Yes," she said sighing. "And I don't know why. You were mad at me or something. I think you were telling me to go away, that I didn't matter to you anymore. That I was useless."

"I would never say anything like that to you," he said very upset.

"I know," she said calmly. "Like I said, it was just a dream." She paused again and then added, "But it felt so real." She leaned back onto her pillows and hid her face in her hands. "Oh I hate dreams."

"I'm guessing you don't have many nice ones, huh?" he asked with a kind smile.

"I've never had a nice one," she said plainly. "Demons don't have pleasant dreams."

This news was a little shocking to Beast Boy. True, he had never seen Raven get up in the morning and say, "Boy, did I have a nice dream last night." But he never figured that she had never had one.

"Wow, that sucks." Those were the only words he could manage to say, and he wanted to kick himself the moment it left his lips. He sounded so unintelligent and infantile.

"Tell me about it," she said with a bitter chuckle.

A silence grew between them. Beast Boy looked at the floor and then felt the blanket he was sitting on. He suddenly realized that it was three o'clock in the morning and he was in Ravens room. There was something he never thought he would… think about.

"Beast Boy?"

"Yeah?" he said, being jerked out of his own thoughts.

She slowly sat up and rested her elbows on her knees. "Why did you stop telling me jokes?"

He was caught completely off guard and his mind went blank. "What?"

"Why did you stop telling me jokes? Why did you stop trying to make me smile? Why did you decide to stop?"

"Why are you asking me this?"

"I just… I want to know why."

"Raven…" started Beast Boy but it took him a long time to form the right words. "You just…" He sighed. "It became obvious to me that as much as I tried, you were never _going_ to smile. You were never _going_ to laugh. And I couldn't take it anymore. All I ever did was be nice to you and try to be your friend. And all you ever did to me was verbally abuse me and act like I was a fly buzzing around your head. So I finally decided that what I was doing, telling you jokes and trying to make you smile, was pointless and a waste of my time."

"It wasn't pointless," said Raven shaking her head. "As much as I hated your constant spew of bad jokes, I liked your determination. I liked that no matter how much I told you to stop you wouldn't give up on me. And when you did…" She stopped.

"Raven, why didn't you tell me?" he asked putting his hand on her knee.

"Well I'm telling you now," she said a little coldly.

Beast Boy looked at her, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. She just stared down at the covers with a furrowed brow. She seemed angry, but he wasn't sure who she was angry with. Him or her.

"Jesus, Raven, I had no idea," he said softly. "I really must have been misreading your signals."

"No, you weren't," she said plainly. "I was just too stubborn to actually let you know. Too stubborn and too damn proud."

"Well… I'm glad I know now," he said with a small smile. "I've got a few dozen jokes I've been waiting to try out on someone."

"That's okay," said Raven. "You don't have to."

"Oh, you're not getting off that easily," he said with an evil grin.

"Well could you at least hold off until sunrise?" she asked.

"Okay, but you better be ready tomorrow," he said almost jumping up and down from the excitement.

"Oh, I can't wait," she said sarcastically and rolling her eyes. Beast Boy knew that she was just being herself, but he couldn't help feeling a little hurt by the comment. Then he saw her look at him out of the corner of her eye and then give a little smile. "Thanks Beast Boy."

"Hey, what are friends for?" he said with a smile.

Then she did something else he never expected. She leaned over to him and hugged him. "And thanks for making sure I was okay."

"I wouldn't have been a good friend or teammate if I had just left you lying there in pain," he said mimicking what she had said to him after healing him.

She smiled and he smiled as well, even though they couldn't see each other. They were still in the hug and it felt quite… nice. Not like the one they had had earlier that day, or the day before since it was now early morning. This one was warm and soft, not intense and full of mixed emotions.

They released the hug and stared at each other for a few moment; their soft smiles still on their faces. It took a few moments for them to snap back and adjust themselves. It had been an odd moment and they suddenly felt awkward.

"Well, I better go back to my room," said Best Boy with a nervous smile.

"Yeah," said Raven, her eyes darting around the room.

He stood up and as he reached the door he turned to he and said, "Good night."

"Good night," she said back, her voice a little queer.

He was about to leave when he turned back and said, "Oh, and pleasant dreams."

"Thanks," she said with an innocent smile. He smiled back and closed her door. She sat there for a few moments, thinking about what had just happened. Too many things to think about. She sighed and laid back on her pillow. She didn't know why, but she felt lonely for the rest of the night. Even when she was asleep.

Beast Boy crawled into his bed and lay down. He stared up at the ceiling and thought about his conversations with Raven. So many things he hadn't known about her. She had never had a good dream. She had liked his jokes and his constant bothering her. She liked that he had went into her room to make sure she was okay. Over the past few years he had barely thought about her at all. But that night he fell asleep with a slight smile on his face knowing that he mattered to her.


	7. It's All in His Head

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 7: It's All in His Head

Just as he promised, the next day he spewed out joke after joke to Raven. The other three Titans thought he had gone insane. He hadn't done this in about three years, what could have compelled him to start up again? Not only that, but he was around Raven all day telling her all of these horrible, corny jokes. They actually feared for his safety.

"Beast Boy, why do you wish to become injured again?" asked Starfire quite seriously.

"What're you talking about?" asked a totally clueless Beast Boy.

"Man, you've been spewing jokes at Raven all day," said Cyborg. "What's wrong you?"

"Well, if you must know, she happens to like my telling her jokes," said Beast Boy quite smug.

"She likes your jokes?" asked a very surprised Robin.

"Well, no, she likes me telling her jokes," said Beast Boy.

"So, she likes that you tell her the jokes, but she doesn't like the jokes themselves?" asked Starfire a bit confused.

"Basically," said Beast Boy.

The three looked at each other and then back at Beast Boy. He was relaxing on the couch with his hands behind his head; his eyes closed and a smile on his face. He actually felt happy. He hadn't felt like this in what seemed forever. Sure, he had been content, but he had never actually felt happy. Now that he did he actual felt quite at peace with himself.

Raven entered and saw the four other Titans standing around the couch, with Beast Boy sitting of course. She wasn't sure what was going on, but she figured she probably didn't want to know. She went over to one of the large windows and got in a meditating position. She was about five feet off the ground with her legs crossed. She rested her upturned hands on her knees.

Cyborg decided to go work on the T-car and Robin and Starfire headed off to the movies. Beast Boy turned the television on and settled in for a nice, quiet afternoon. He still had a few jokes he had yet to unleash on Raven, but he figured he would wait until she was done meditating.

A few minutes into one of the shows he was watching he found himself paying less attention to the screen and more to the hovering Raven. She was completely still as she sat in the air. He could just hear her chanting her mantra. The sunlight made her appear more golden than pale and it was a brilliant look for her. He could see her profile by the way she was sitting and he slowly studied her. Her once round face was now more defined, a woman's face. Her violet eyes were covered by her hood, her pouting lips lightly touching each other. He watched her chest fall and rise in a slow rhythm as she breathed. She had a glorious chest, as far as chests went.

'_You like her!_' said his inner mind.

'What?' he asked himself shocked at the thought.

'_You like her! You like her!_'

'I do not! Well, I mean, of course I like her, she's my friend again.'

'_You want to kiss her!_'

'What?'

'_You want to hug her and kiss her!_'

'Now that would be just the hormones talkin'. God, when do stupid teenage hormones go away anyway?'

'_Hold her!_'

'Hormones.'

'_Kiss her!_'

'Enough!'

He snapped out of his argument and back into reality. He looked at Raven and saw that she hadn't moved at all. She was still meditating. He was relieved; he was sure that if she had looked over at him he would have blurted out some embarrassing. He watched how calm her face was when she was meditating.

An odd feeling was welling up in his stomach. He had to stop looking at her. He pried his eyes away and tried to keep them on the television screen. But just knowing that she was there was enough to keep his mind from focusing. He finally decided that the safest thing to do was leave. He jumped up and headed for the gym. Working out always cleared his mind.

Raven would never have told him that she could feel every feeling Beast Boy had felt. She was glad that her hood had been up and had covered her blushing cheeks. Her heart was racing at this point. What a strange feeling it was. She had never experienced such feelings before. 'So that's what boys feel during puberty,' she thought to herself feeling her cheeks grow redder. 'I've got to give credit to the guys for controlling themselves for all of these years.'

Beast Boy ran on the treadmill for a few minutes to warm up. He then moved onto the weight machines. Once he got a good sweat going he attacked the punching bag. The adrenaline was pumping through his veins and he felt invincible as he pummeled the bag. He had learned that working out in his human form was better for his muscle build than in an animal form. Once he had figured that out he saw his body became more muscular and less wiry.

He decided to wrap it up and walked a few minutes on the treadmill. This was the first time he had worked out in almost two weeks and he didn't want to push himself too hard. His plan to get Raven out of his mind had worked, but it came back as soon as his heart rate got back to normal and the adrenaline was diminishing.

After a good shower Beast Boy went back to the common room and was relieved to see that Raven had left. He went to the fridge and decided to make himself some lunch. He hummed to himself as he made himself a sandwich. He danced around and sang into a knife like a microphone. It was one of the few things he absolutely loved to do, but would die if anyone caught him doing it. And sure enough…

"I think a spoon would provide a better microphone."

Beast Boy let out a girly scream and dropped the knife, nearly striking his foot. He turned around and saw Raven standing behind him. "Jesus Christ!" he said grabbing his chest to make sure his heart didn't explode out of it. "Raven, what the hell?"

"What?" she asked plainly. "I didn't do anything wrong."

"You snuck up on me," he said half angrily.

"No, you just couldn't hear me over the chorus," she said smugly and made her way over to the couch with her book.

Beast Boy blushed and felt totally naked. He was so glad that she was no longer facing him. "You're not going to tell anyone, are you?"

"That you sing to yourself while cooking?" she asked opening her book. "No, I can't see any benefit to the team if I told them. Though it is a juicy bit of blackmail."

Beast Boy rarely saw the bloodthirsty side of Raven. Of course, there was a reason for it, what with her father's will and all. But once in a while she would show a little bit of a competitive side or an evil sense of humor. She sometimes got like this when they played stankball. And as she said her little "blackmail" comment he could see her face slightly contort into a wicked smile. He didn't know why, but he _loved_ it when she got like that. It was so out of character for her. He couldn't help but get a shiver up his spine. But this wasn't a new feeling; it had been there whenever she showed this side.

The room was silent as Raven read her book and Beast Boy ate his lunch. He could see her from the table and he watched as she slowly took her hood down. She only did that when she was feeling comfortable in her surroundings. What a nice feeling to know she felt comfortable with him in the room. He could now study her from the back, even if it only was her head. Her pin straight violet hair that now brushed her shoulders slightly hung over the back of the couch. That meant she was leaning back, something else she never did unless she was really comfortable.

"Beast Boy, I might not be able to see you, but I can feel your eyes on me," she said casually turning the page of her book.

Beast Boy had been caught again. He had to start being more careful. "I was just, uh, glancing over," he said trying to cover up his lingering eyes.

"Well you've been "glancing over" at me a lot lately," she said in her normal tone. "And it's starting to make me feel uncomfortable."

'Uncomfortable?' he thought. 'You look like you're completely comfortable. Jeez, you are the queen of mixed signals.'

"I heard that," she said in his mind.

Caught again. He had to get out of there before this got serious. He quickly finished off his lunch and headed for his room. Raven didn't even budge as he exited.

"Okay, there's something very strange going on," he said to himself once he reached his room. "Let's break it down. First I'm Ravens friend. We don't really get along, but we're friends. Then a few years go by and we can't stand each other. Friendship is over. Then I nearly kill her and she comforts me. Then she has a nightmare about me and spills her feelings about my telling her jokes. We become friends again. But now I keep staring at her and she keeps catching me. What the hell does that mean?" He pondered this, but couldn't come up with any conclusions.

"_She cares about you_," said his inner mind.

"Not you again," he moaned.

"_And you care about her._"

"Like I said before, she's my friend."

"_She sure is pretty._"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"_Uh ha! So you do think she's pretty._"

"Would you go away!"

"_Sorry Dude, I'm here to stay._"

"Fucking hormones."

"_What the hell makes you think I'm your hormones? Haven't you ever felt an attraction to anyone without hormones being involved?_"

"ATTRACTION!"

Beast Boy couldn't think anymore. His mind was betraying him. How the hell did that work? He had always trust his thoughts and his brain. Even if he didn't use it much, which he confessed openly. But at this point he just couldn't take anymore thinking. He was getting a headache.

Raven had enjoyed that chapter. She felt propelled to go onto the next. She turned the page and only got about five words in when she suddenly felt… odd. Like she was confused about something. Her mind began racing, but there was nothing to race. She got very dizzy and put the book down. Then she felt annoyed, as if she was on the other end of an argument. Then an explosion of shock that nearly made her jump. Slowly it all calmed down and she felt quite drained. She relaxed back into the couch and began to rub her temples.

"Beast Boy," she muttered to herself as her mind calmed down.


	8. Confessions

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 8: Confessions

Beast Boy sat at the table in the fast food place rather nervously. He had asked Cyborg to get a bite with him, but he really needed to talk to him about a more serious issue. It had been three days since his argument with his mind and now he really needed some friendly advice. Cyborg walked over to the table with two large trays of food, and a large grin on his face.

"Alright, I've got at least two of everythin on the menu," he said sitting down. "And don't worry; I made sure that the veggie burgers were nothing but veggie." He handed Beast Boy his burgers and began to chow down. "So what did you want to talk about?" he asked with his mouth half full.

"Well, it's something kinda… important," said Beast Boy slowly unwrapping his burger. He really didn't have much of an appetite, but he knew Cyborg would.

"Well then spill it," said Cyborg swallowing.

Beast Boy suddenly felt butterflies in his stomach. Did he want to tell Cyborg? Maybe this wasn't that big of a deal. No, he had to tell him. He needed help. He took a big breath in and said, "I think I might like Raven."

"Well thank goodness," said Cyborg, not phased at all. "You two have been at each others throats for the last few years. It's about time you became friends again. I can understand why you might be confused though, I mean hating her one minute and then bein her friend again. It's gotta be confusin."

Beast Boy looked at him queerly. "What? No, that's not what I mean."

"Then what do you mean?" asked Cyborg starting to slurp through his straw.

"I mean I might… _like_ her," he said, stressing the word.

Cyborg slowly stopped slurping and raised an eyebrow. Then it hit him like a ton of bricks and he nearly in hailed the straw as he gasped. He began to choke and the straw soon flew out and almost hit Beast Boy in the eye.

"WHAT!" he shouted.

"SSH!" Beast Boy hissed. "Keep it down!"

"You like Raven?" he said, not toning it down at all.

Beast Boy lunged across the table and covered Cyborg's mouth. "Would you shut up?" he said through his teeth. He slowly released Cyborg's mouth and sat back down in his seat. He laid his head down on the table and covered it with his hands.

"Okay," said Cyborg calming down. "I'll keep it down. It's just… wow! You like Raven?"

"I think I might," he said through the table.

"Are you sure?" Cyborg just couldn't believe this. "Raven? What would make you think that you like Raven?"

"I'm not sure," he said looking up. "I'm so confused. Every time I'm near her I can't help staring at her. It's like my eyes are drawn to her."

"Well, that doesn't mean you have a crush on her," said Cyborg trying to think of a more rational explanation. "You're still probably sufferin from that guilt about almost killin her."

"No, I'm over that," he said finally sitting up. "She helped me. I had a complete emotional breakdown and she made me feel better."

"An emotional breakdown?" asked Cyborg.

"Yeah, I kinda… started crying," he said feeling really embarrassed. "Well, that would be putting it mildly. I wept, Cy, I wept. I've never cried like that in my life."

"And… Raven helped you?" asked Cyborg very doubtfully.

"Yeah. She… hugged me," said Beast Boy, remember that cold day. "She held me in her arms and I cried into her chest. She told me that I had no reason to feel guilty. She was so… kind. Warm and kind."

"Wow, wish I coulda seen that," said Cyborg with a smile.

"If you tell anyone she's gonna kill me," said Beast Boy. "I'm not even sure I should be telling you."

"Hey, I'm ya best friend," he said reaching over and rubbing his shoulder reassuringly. "Ya don't have ta keep secrets from me."

"I know, it's all just so embarrassing," said Beast Boy rubbing his face.

"Not to mention confusin," said Cyborg scratching his head. He sighed and cleared his mind. "Okay, let's try and sort things out here. You think you're sweet on Raven, correct?"

"Yes," said Beast Boy, his eyes covered by his hands.

"Alright, reasons why you think you like her: you can't stop staring at her, she was nice to you in your time of need, anything else?"

"I dunno," said Beast Boy in a sigh. "Sometimes I get these odd feelings when I'm near her. Like my stomachs twisting around and my heart starts to race."

"Ah," said Cyborg with a smile. "Now _that_ would be crush feelings."

Beast Boy gave a whiny noise and slammed his head back down onto the table. "How could this have happened?"

"You're askin the wrong cyborg. You gotta be askin yourself that."

"I have," he said sitting up again. "I keep trying to figure out what's going on; trying to find some other reason I would be feeling this way. I just… I don't want to feel this way about her. It's just too weird."

"No kiddin," said Cyborg.

"So what do you think I should do?"

"I really don't know, man," sighed Cyborg. "I mean, ya can't help feelin the way ya feel."

"Maybe it's just a phase," said Beast Boy optimistically. "Maybe if I just stay away from her and ignore what I'm feeling it will pass over. I mean, I've already been kinda doing that for the past three days. Think it'll work?"

"Maybe," said Cyborg. "But what if it doesn't?"

"I'll just have to hope it does." He gave Cyborg a weak smile and Cyborg gave him one back.

The two entered the common room and saw Robin and Starfire on the couch watching a movie. His arm was draped over her shoulder and they were close together. They turned and saw the robotic man and green changeling enter.

"There you two are," said Robin.

"Just went out for something to eat," said Cyborg.

"Beast Boy, Raven wishes to speak to you," said Starfire.

'SHIT!' he thought. "Why?" he asked in a nervous voice.

"I do not know," said Starfire. "She simply requested for us to tell you that she wishes to speak to you."

Beast Boy sighed a defeated sigh and made his way to Ravens room. Robin and Starfire weren't sure why he had suddenly become so low, but Cyborg knew.

He trudged down the hall and stopped in front of Ravens door. He knocked on her door and said, "Raven, it's Beast Boy. Starfire said you wanted to talk to me."

The door slide aside and revealed Raven sitting on her bed. "Come in," she said in her usual tone.

He sighed and went in. He was upset with her, now. Here he was trying to stay away from her and she was inviting him into her room. Why couldn't anything ever go the way he planned? "What?" he asked in an annoyed tone.

"Are you mad at me about something?" she asked plainly.

"No, why?" he asked in an irritated tone that made his comment sound like a lie.

"Because you sure seem to be," she said getting a little irritated with him as well. "You've been completely ignoring me these past few days and the other day I got these odd feelings through you."

'FUCK!' he thought. He always forgot that Raven could feel his emotions. Now he was really getting mad at her. "And so you think that there's something wrong with me?" He really couldn't think of what to say. "Maybe I just didn't feel like talking to you." God, that didn't come out right.

Raven just stared at him for a few seconds. At first she looked surprised, then a slight bit of hurt, but that gave way to sheer emotionless ness. "Well, that's all I wanted to know," she said in a monotone voice. "Please leave."

'Damn it!' he thought to himself. 'I made her feel bad again. Why the hell do I keep doing this?'

"I said please leave," she said again, a bit annoyed.

He hadn't even realized that he had just been standing there, looking at her blankly. But now that he did, he couldn't stop. Staring at her that is. She had picked up her book and began to read, but she was completely aware that he was still there. He studied her from the front now. Her hair was draped in front of her and nearly covered her face as she looked down at the book. Her eyes were half way closed and her face seemed relaxed. But it soon turned aggravated as she looked up at him again.

"Why do you keep doing that?" she asked upset.

"Sorry?" he asked, snapping out of his trance of her.

"Why do you keep staring at me, Beast Boy?" she asked almost yelling. "I can always feel your eyes on me. And then I get this flustered feeling coming off of you. Then there's a mix of confusion and anger and other various things I've never felt before. Now tell me why you have this need to fucking stare at me?"

"I don't know!" he blurted out. This was all too much for him. He was sick of all of these feelings. He was sick of being caught. He was sick of being so fucking confused! "I don't know why I keep staring at you. But something within me is drawing my eyes to you. And I know that that's not a good enough answer for you, but it's all I've got at the moment. And as for the feelings, I haven't a clue where those are coming from either."

Raven was taken quite aback by this. But she never led on that she was. She just stared at him with a plain face and listened to his words. When he was done he felt like he was too close to saying something he would probably regret. That he liked her. That he had a crush on her. He always seemed to have a tendency to put his foot in his mouth. So he just stood there for a few silent moments, looking at the floor.

"Beast Boy…" she started, but he didn't give her a chance to finish. He turned and almost ran out of her room. "Beast Boy!" she called after him but he couldn't go back. He had never felt so embarrassed in his whole life. This was worse than telling Cyborg that he had cried into Ravens chest. It was worse than Raven catching him singing into a butter knife. He had to get out of there.

He wondered if every time he had a problem he was sit on that bloody boulder. Was this really his answer to everything? To sit on a rock in front of his home and look for an answer over the water. He felt so pathetic.


	9. Short and Sweet

**A/N: I do not own the Teen Titans. Trust me, you'd know if I did.**

Chapter 9: Short and Sweet

"You don't like it, do you?"

He knew it was her. She always seemed to find him in his weakest moments.

"What don't I like?" he asked, not turning around.

"These feelings you're feeling towards me," she said, not moving.

He sighed and looked up at the darkening sky. "In all honesty? No, I don't." He turned around and faced her. "I don't like the fact that I can't keep anything from you, either." He turned back around and looked out over the horizon. "How long have you known?"

"A couple days," she said feeling a little awkward.

"Well I'm sure you knew before I even did," he said angrily with himself.

Raven slowly made her way over to him. She could feel how tense he was. How embarrassed and confused and unsure he was. She knew that he didn't want her near him at the moment, but she couldn't just leave him like this. It would be better to just wrap all of this up now.

"You don't have to feel embarrassed," she finally said. "I'm not going to treat you any different. And if you want to just ignore what you're feeling, then I'm fine with that. Nothing has to change between us."

"Easy for you to say," he said tossing a stone. "You're not feeling all of these weird emotions."

"I am whenever you're near," she said a little timid. "Look, I don't want us to stop being friends again. I'm lucky to have the friends that I have and losing my friendship with you all over again… I just don't think I could handle that."

"I don't think I could either," he said looking up at her. She was standing at his side by this point. He slowly moved over and she sat down. The two sat there in silence, looking out at the remnants of the setting sun.

"Funny isn't it?" he finally said.

"What is?"

"If we hadn't gotten in that car accident we wouldn't be friends again," he said looking at her with a slight smile. "It did more repair than it did damage."

Raven gave a slight smile, but it was very slight. He wanted her to smile. The kind of smile he never got to really see. A warm feeling coursed through him, followed by that nervous jittery feeling. He quickly looked away. Raven did smile then and blush. She actually liked these feeling coming off of him. They were exciting, odd, and flattering.

"What if I told you that I might be feeling something?" she asked very nervously.

"What? You mean my stupid "crush" feelings?" he sighed.

"Well, yeah, but what if they weren't… yours?" she asked, her heart racing nervously.

It took Beast Boy a moment to catch onto what she was saying. He turned to her and said, "What? Who else…" He saw her turn away from him and blush. "Oh," he said. "You… like me too?"

"I might," she said casually, as if it really wasn't that big of a deal. She looked back at him and saw that he was really staring at her now. "I mean, it's kind of hard to tell, what with your constant emotions pouring into my open mind."

"Well, how do you know what feelings are yours?" he asked very interested.

"I'm not sure," she said looking away. "Usually I can just tell the difference. But lately it's almost like my emotions and your emotions are meshing together. It's a new experience for me." Then she paused for a few moments. "I'm… not sure if I like it."

Beast Boy felt like she had slapped him in the face. But then he realized that he had been feeling the exact same thing. He wasn't sure if he liked what he was feeling towards her, either.

"It's all just too odd," she said looking at the stones below her.

"I've been thinking the exact same thing," he said with a chuckle.

"I know," said Raven plainly.

Well of course she knew. She seemed to know everything. "So what do we do about this?" he asked. He desperately wanted to resolve this odd situation.

"Well, the smart thing for us to do would be to ignore these odd feelings we have for each other and just let them fizzle out with time," said Raven very matter-of-factly. "The only problem with that is there's chance that they don't go away and we're stuck living the rest of our lives awkwardly ignoring each other."

"I'm guessing, and hoping, that there's another choice?" he asked.

"Yes, we act upon our feelings and just see what happens," she said a little more hesitantly.

Beast Boy thought about the two choices. They were tough. Do what was smart or do what felt right? Well, he knew which one Raven would want to do. "I'm going to guess you want to just ignore and forget, right?"

"It is the smart thing to do," said Raven with a sigh. "And you know me. I'm about logic, not feelings."

"Yeah, I know," said Beast Boy sighing as well. It was dark now; they could only see the silhouettes of each other in the diminishing dusk light. All they could hear was the sound of the ocean before them lapping at the rocks. A slightly cool breeze blew by and sent the two of them into goose bumps. "I just wish there was another option. I mean, it's been a long time since I've felt like this towards anyone. I like this feeling, I really do, I just don't feel like it's right that I'm feeling it for you. No offense."

"None taken," said Raven still looking out over the horizon. "I feel the same way about you. No offense."

"None taken."

Another moment of silence. It was really getting ridiculous now. They had to come up with a solution. Beast Boy looked at her silhouette and a small smile crept on his face. He didn't know why the sight of her gave him a warm feeling that made him smile. But now that he knew that she was feeling similar emotions towards him, something had changed within him. He didn't know why, but he no longer felt so awkward around her. He felt… brave.

"Am I going to have to get used to you staring at me?" she asked turning to him and catching his eyes, which were hidden in the dark of the evening.

"I think you might," he said with a slight smile. Raven gave him a small smile back, but it faded as she saw Beast Boy's face coming closer to her own. She had just enough time for her heart to jump before she closed her eyes and felt his lips upon hers.

The kiss was warm, soft, and sweet. It only lasted a mere five seconds, but it certainly didn't feel long enough. Their lips slowly parted and their eyes opened even slower. They stared at each other for a few moments before Beast Boy went in for a second kiss. As he softly kissed her one thought went through his mind. 'Thank God for car accidents.'

**THE END**

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